Haiku Tuesday - Corn Shucking, by Pat

Time to get shuckin'

Y'all goin to be cryin

when I weigh my corn

Practice makes perfect

my form is a work of art

ears will be flying

I'm known in these parts

as "Dirty mudder shucker"

soon you will know why

Ears almost as big

As his imagination

if kev thinks he'll win

The corns growing tall

The shit is getting deeper

as Sunday gets near

More thoughts on Palin, like you haven't heard enough

An excerpt from an interview on CNN.com with Fareed Zakaria.

Zakaria: Look, I'm not saying that she is not a feisty, charismatic politician who has done some good things in Alaska. It is just we are talking about a person who should be ready to lead the United States at a moment's notice. She has never spent a day thinking about any important national or international issue, and this is a hell of a time to start.

CNN: Does it make you concerned about Sen. McCain as a president?

Zakaria: Yes, and I say this with sadness because I greatly admire John McCain, a man of intelligence, honor and enormous personal and political courage. However, for him to choose Sara Palin to be his running mate is fundamentally irresponsible. He did not put the country first with this decision. Whether it is appropriate or not, considering Sen. McCain's age most people expected to have a vice presidential candidate who would be ready to step in at a moment's notice. The actuarial odds of that happening are significant, something like a one-in-five chance.

One hell of a night

This kid survived a car accident, followed immediately by a plane crash.

Damn.

Finally!

After years, something finally actually happened last night on The Hills! It was incredible to see what the show was like when stuff actually, you know, happens! Wow.

This is for you, Shell

Our last day in Barbados Mr. Perfect and I suddenly decided to take senior pictures. And then, it all just clicked in my mind. The front porch to our room... senior pictures...

wow.

It's... it's... amazing! And creepy!

And it's just for you, Shell. I know this is your all-time favorite bad senior picture/posed photo of me. Enjoy.

Heroes

I hate how every time Claire sees her mom on Heroes she says, "MOM?" and her mom sticks her palm out and flames jump out of her hand.

I feel like it would be the same if her mom stood there and smacked bubble gum. It's awkward.

Lunch Invite from my friend Jen:

"Let's do lunch before the economy collapses and we can't afford to go out!"

of Montreal wall decals

WANT!!!

I've always loved of Montreal's artwork (by lead singer Kevin's brother David, and no, not that Brother David), and I think this is such a fabulous idea. Loves it.

Check out this Pitchfork article that has more photos and examples of the CD packaging.

Also, I wish every time I sat down it looked like this (minus the bald head & all):

I'm excited. I already pre-ordered Skeletal Lamping.

Searches say? Shuckin' time

I knew it was Corn Shuckin' time the other day, not because of the calendar, but because of the keyword searches that were popping up.

The number 3 search that lands people here? corn shucking contest
How disappointed do you think they are? Probably not any more disappointed than the number 17 or 18 searchers. But 19? Corn shucker glove? Ooooh yes sir-re! I've got you covered! Speaking of corn shucking gloves, Pat was showing his off to me last night. Because he was out practicing yesterday. Yeah. More on that later.

I don't know why naked and corn shucking searches keep popping up next to each other.
Woah! Good luck, buddy!
I would like to say I'm glad I'm not the only one that associates mermaids & Barbados. But, any happiness I felt from that search was immediately squashed by "most depressing thing in the world." That's right.

You search for the most depressing thing.

In the world.

And you get me.

Awesome.

Going on.

152 - the answer depends on how entertaining your drunk text was.

153 - I... I don't even know what that means, but I'm glad you didn't spend too much time here...

So the results are in, it's Shucking Time.
Sunday, Oct. 5th.
High Noon.
Right outside of A-town.

It's just the Bill of Rights

I heard about this the other day, but couldn't watch it at work. Thanks to K-Did for the link.

See more funny videos and funny pictures at CollegeHumor.

GNO - complete with hiking, shopping and ... drinks!

Saturday morning the girls and I got up early-ish (yeah, after Erin poked her head in to check to see if we were still sleep - TWICE) and went hiking on the Konza. And by hiking I mean we went on a van ride, took a tour of an old homestead, then about a 5 minute hike. This was the spring house at the homestead.

I thought it was totally creepy and started chanting RedRum - then went in stood in the corner a la Blaire Witch. Too bad it looks like I'm taking a leak.
After Erin made fun of me for falling in a river during a hike in Spain, she almost fell in! hahaaha! Or... at least she held this pose really well.

After our "hike" we headed down to Chef off of Poyntz. I was an immediate fan - duh, Wakey wakey eggs-n-bakey! won me over completely!
There were some other interesting signs in Aggieville. Like this one.
Nattyville is a place I would never, ever, ever want to visit.

Oh, and Nick was a big fan of this license plate.
Erins + Tab = GNO!
Ben likes to call himself an honorary GNOer. He claims to have attended 98.9% of GNO's. We love him.

Ben & his ladies. Ben is always surrounded by ladies!
What's a trip to Aggieville without a Belfast Bomber?
Ugh. I had terrible form. I failed this Bomber.
But... it's ok, I also have terrible Egyptian form.

OMG, we headed to Fat's to get a Fishbowl (I know, it was like we were on our own little tour de Aggieville complete with all the famous drinks. We followed Pat's with a Tarantula at Auntie Mae's). We found an empty table with an abandoned fishbowl. Suddenly, a random dude walks up, snags a straw, and starts slurping the dredges of the fishbowl.

Ew.

Ew.

Ew.

After Pat's and Auntie Mae's, we went to Tubby's for some dancing. Dude on crutches was dancing. And smoking.
Annnnd air guitaring!
At the end of the night, we headed to Gumby's for some Pokey Stix. I about peed when I saw this girl. Classic end of the night Aggieville/Gumby's moment.
Another successful GNO with some of my favorite people in the world. What a perfect way to spend a weekend.

Excitement

This weekend:

Going to Manhappiness.

GNO with Erin & Tab, which has not occurred since that fated night in December when I met Mr. Perfect. FYI - This GNO, I plan on wearing pants.

Tailgating.

Exploring the Konza.

Perfection.

Your moment of zen

I've just been staring at this site for a while. I kinda like it. Especially the deer.

Thanks for the link Mark.

Hearing Grey's

Grey's Anatomy came back last night and, as usual, had at least one song that really caught my attention. Enjoy Skinny Love by Bon Iver.

American Royal Volunteer Opportunity

/way to get into Royal for free.



From Steph:

All, I am seeking volunteers to help prep food, clean up and pass out samples at this year's American Royal Cooking Demonstrations. Would you like to get into the Barbecue for free? How about free designated parking? Well, for just two to four hours of "hard labor," you'll get parking, entrance and even a t-shirt for your time! I'm on the American Royal Barbecue Marketing Committee where I am chair of the Cooking Demonstrations event. This event takes place on Saturday afternoon, Oct. 4 in Wagstaff Theatre and features four cooking sessions with celebrity chefs:

12:00 – 12:45 - Chef Kurt Friese

1:00-1:45 - Chef Virginia Willis

2:00-2:45 - Mike Farag

3:00-3:45 - Chef Virginia Willis



I'm looking for volunteers to help with food prep, Friday from 5-7 (before the Barbecue gets crazy) and to help with clean-up, set-up and sampling on Saturday from 11:00-4:30.



While this work isn't glamorous, it's a great way to help support the American Royal's mission and vision for supporting youth in agriculture through scholarships. All profits from the barbecue go toward scholarships. Did I mention volunteers will receive free entrance, free parking, a t-shirt and a badge – not to mention, the satisfaction of being involved in such a great event?!Volunteers can contact me - Stephanie - at:

sam92077@gmail.com



P.S. Pass this on to your culinary inclined friends...a great opportunity to work with professional chefs!

Filter Skate Palin

What would your name be if you were Sarah Palin's kid?

K-did is really outdoing himself today with the linkage.

Yet another reason

to reduce our dependence on foreign oil

A vote for Obama...

Is a vote for brown people.
At least, according to Caroline.

Someone should have read the headline first... UPDATED

The International Herald Tribune, which is the Global version of the New York Times, published election results online yesterday.

And they're still up, with the best headline ever: These are TEST returns. They must not be broadcast or published.

Thanks to K-Did for the link.

Update on the Squirrels

Shell: I've been driving around all day!!
Me: Perfect! Have you seen a lot of dead squirrels? I was just writing about that!
Shell: No. They're distracted by the nuts!
Me: Yeah, it's that time of year.
Shell: It would be like if shoes were falling out of the sky, you'd be distracted too.


hmmm... true, but I don't (typically) eat shoes. I do store them in my kitchen. Close enough.

Squirrels begging to be melted

I have seen a really ridiculous amount of dead squirrels lately. Anyone else?

Flower Power

Spotted: this insanely willful flower in the parking lot outside of Latte Land on State Line.

You're a zygote

Me: So yeah, apparently it's good for you.
Younger coworker: Yeah, everyone has known that since 1982.
Me: Don't you tell me about 1982! You weren't even a zygote then! At least I was a zygote!

Barbados - Day Four

On Thursday Mr. Perfect and I were picked up for our catamaran tour. We did the Tiami tour - I would highly recommend it. We had hotel transfer, a lunch buffet and were able to snorkel with turtles! It was awesome.

The trip started out great - I saw Melinda! Well, Melinda II... Mr. Perfect spent some quality time acting as my own personal paparazzi during the cruise. I'm impressed with my ability to look so cheesy without trying.

Laying on the net was super comfy.
The guys on the boat were great - the worked the sails, the bar, served lunch, snorkeled, danced with people - everything! They worked hard to create a really fun and comfortable atmosphere.

As Mr. Perfect put it, "Bajans shorten everything."

Full body shot in our suits, and what bitches? We ain't scurred!

Mr. Perfect got some great shots around the boat.

And stalked me more...

This little girl was so cute - fell asleep right after we got on the boat and didn't wake up until we were almost home!
Finally - snorkeling!! We stopped twice to snorkel, once where turtles like to hang and again to check out a sunken ship and the coral reef!

After a debate back and forth - mostly just me going back and forth and Mr. Perfect listening - we decided to get an underwater camera. Most of our shots were just complete crap, but there were some... interesting ones.

I was so happy and surprised that there actually were about 3 turtles swimming around. They came up and swam around groups of people. Pretty amazing, even if I was worried they'd bite off my boner.

I don't think snorkels in mouth = Sexy pics
I'm so proud of this shot. I was pretty sure that I was only going to capture about 1/4 of Mr. Perfect's face in any one shot. Instead, I win! Best underwater shot of the day!
Strange fishies.

Sunken ships! Treasure!

But.. let me be honest, the real discovery wasn't the ship or any treasure. It was finding out what I really look like/act like, and mostly, smile like, underwater. Wow. And there's more.
I can haz air?

Yeah.

Wow.

I'll give you a moment.

I like to blame a variety of issues for this... Underwater Face.

1) I was struggling a lot in the snorkeling picture. We were wearing light life jackets that made it kinda hard to stay underwater - although Mr. Perfect claims I have no ability to make myself sink - which, you know, I don't really see a problem with that. My goal is never sinking.

2) The crazy eyes I like to blame on the fact that I don't think I've opened my eyes underwater without goggles (we were back at the hotel pool killing the last two shots) since I was ... oh, 8!

3) For some reason, smiling like that kept water out of my mouth. I don't know if that's true or why that would be such a major issue, but... yeah. That's the best I can come up with.

4) Duh, I'm a horrible swimmer who has a fear of water trying to smile/look happy. Underwater.

So there it is folks.

I learned that I'm supremely unattractive underwater.

Mr. Perfect didn't even want me to post these pictures - actually what he said was, "Have you seen your face?!?"

I have.

And I don't understand it.

But I'm ok with it.